And most of us just don’t love sports, we allow sports to
make us temporarily insane. I don’t mean
in jubilation for winning or sorrow for losses.
I mean sports make us insane because they alter our integrity.
Let’s admit one thing – we can all be steadfastly opposed to
athletes who cheat, steal, do drugs, assault their spouses, make racist or
homophobic comments, or generally act like arrogant SOBs…as long as they play
for the OTHER team. If they play for our
team…well…?
There are athletes who deserve our scorn, and if they play
for the other team, they are a properly labeled as jerks. If they play for our team, we may actually
root harder for them, because they are OUR jerks.
You could carry disdain for someone on the other team for
years, but then they are signed by your team as a free agent. Instantly, he’s matured as a player, learned
from his mistakes, fallible like any human being, and someone who should be
judged for his play, not his character.
See – sports make us insane (ethically).
There are some exceptions.
I don’t know that any fan would have truly embraced Barry Bonds. Or Mark McGuire. Or Michael Vick (well, actually that one did
shift).
So, what does this have to do with fraternity – the subject
of this blog?
A fraternity or sorority – like many sports teams – can be
prone to differential ethics when it comes to their own “players.” In other words, when it’s our guy, a behavior
or action can easily be dismissed. When
it’s the other team’s guy, we very easily pass out judgment as easily as candy
on Halloween.
Consider a scenario.
Imagine you are at a party hosted by some other organization. At that party you see a guy making moves on a
clearly intoxicated woman. In that
situation, we may intervene, or at the minimum, be upset or disgusted by that
behavior. Now imagine if that same thing
is happening in your chapter house, and the guy is your brother. Might the feeling be different?
The challenge is that we become emotionally invested in
those on our team – those we are expected to root for. It makes us treat them with situational
ethics. But, in reality, that emotional
investment is selfish.
If we were truly invested in our players – then we wouldn’t
have different accountability standards for them. Because the best thing for those players is
to be held accountable, so that they grow as individuals. Our members are not served by our protection,
or willful ignorance of their screw-ups and misdeeds.
There is danger in team mentality. It can cause us to apply our ethics in a
schizophrenic fashion. We should also
remember that no single player is greater than the team. Dismissing behavior that should be confronted
is gambling with our organization’s future – just like the sports franchise
that drafts someone with a history of problems.
We should definitely be fans of our own fraternities and the
members who belong to them. Let’s choose
to practice the best aspects of fandom:
- Fans are patient and loyal, and can survive losing seasons because of hope of what’s to come.
- Fans are forgiving, and generally will accept mistakes if there is demonstrated intent to make corrections.
- Fans can bring life to a team when it needs it most, and the best fans do not give up until the bitter end.
At the same time, let’s remember some very important points
that may not be reflected in professional sports, but should be true for our
organizations:
- Winning with players you admire and respect is exponentially better than winning with players whose behavior you have to tolerate. Choose to populate your team with the former, even if it delays winning.
- No player is entitled to be on a team, nor is any team forced to accept a player below their standards.
- Any hate or disdain for players on other teams should be redirected towards rigorous accountability for players on our own teams.
A quick point in closing: it’s not always the miscreants in
sports that can make us temporarily insane.
It’s also the exceptional individuals.
Think about the hatred cast upon Tim Tebow. Or Lebron James for a time. In sports, we have a tendency to hate people
because of how good they are. Crazy, but
true. Steer clear of that in fraternity
as well. If the other guy in the other
organization is doing really good stuff, seek to learn from it, not hate
it.
We can choose who we root for, who we root against, and the
reasons why. I challenge you to stop and
consider that for yourself. Let’s be
fans who are loyal, patient, and enthusiastic.
But not insane.
But not insane.
No comments:
Post a Comment